How's this for a stonker of a Christmas present? We let Uber Rock's clown prince Zoot loose with an album to review and a couple of crayons. How would our man-child cope with the instrumental strains of Swedish duo Fair Play? There's only one way to find out....Ladies and Gentlemen, please accept into your hearts the very first album review from Zoot.....

Four years on from the release of their acclaimed debut album, Venezuelan metallers Cultura Tres return with their sophomore release ‘El Mal del Bien’, but hold it right there a minute if you think this is just going to be an exercise in thrash by numbers because as Mark Ashby is about to explain Cultura Tres are a band with more than just a liking of doom, in fact they live a breath it. So click that linky to the right if you want to know more.

“Freitod are a German black/death metal band.” Okay you got that? Because Mark Ashby wants you to fully understand that fact right from the off as he reviews the band’s second full length album ‘Regenjahre’. So if you think this might be somewhat short for one of our usual review intros then you had better click the link to find out why.

Released on Ship Wreckords? This debut album from the Cornwall-born Crowns was going to be a little piratey, surely? Uber Rock's Jo Hayes discovered, however, that instead of being surrounded by seamen, she would find herself a victim of some Irish punk jiggery-pokery. Walk the plank to the Read More link to get to the bottom of this enigma.....

Promising to be heavier than his previous decade of AOR albums Frederic Slama has assembled a stellar cast of vocalists to support him on his eleventh studio album including the likes of Greg Christian, Paul Shortino, Paul Sabu and Chris Ousey to name just four. Question is would Rob Watkins find enough cohesion within such a rotating cast of frontman to send him off into AOR heaven? Click the link and you’ll soon find out.

Sleazy hard rawkers Snew return with album number three, 'What's It To Ya', an album so familiar sounding that Uber Rock's Gaz E almost forgot that it was a new album meant for review! Hit the Read More link to discover if this bunch of retro rockers have turned in a prime slice of classic rock once again.....

Remember the time when albums by the likes of Virginia Wolf, FM and Strangeways would have your mullet blowing in the wind as you sped in your Capri Ghia down to the local newsagents to pick up your weekly Kerrang? No? Well Swedish group Sapphire Eyes must do because their debut album is a ten track work of A(O)RT that Rob Watkins simply can’t get enough of. Simply click the link to check out what he is raving on about.

Album number ten from Dani Filth and his extreme metal godfathers Cradle Of Filth, but will this one be more of the same old same old or will it see the band once again return the sounds of their glory years. Mark Ashby is the man with all the answers as he devours ‘The Manticore & Other Horrors’ in all its black metal glory.

When Lionville released their debut album back in 2011 they immediately took the world of AOR by storm with their West Coast styled melodic rock perfection. Two years on and Stefano Lionetti now returns with a dozen more tracks in the vein of Richard Marx and Toto that are quite possibly about to blow the scene away once again. Rob Watkins rolls up his satin jacket sleeves to write the review of his lifetime, well his lifetime up until about 1987 anyway. Click the link to find out more about what could be the AOR release of 2012.

Never heard of Brownsville Station? Think again. You know that 'Smokin' in the Boys Room' song that the second best ever singer in Motley Crue warbled over back in the '80s? Yep, that's by Brownsville Station. Uber Rock's Dom Daley is generally defacing boys rooms with Sharpies rather than smoking in them, but he was still first choice to review this new release from a veteran band for your reading pleasure.....